Here are a few songs from my every-growing sex mix…
The last two days have done a fucking number on me. We all construct structures on which we lean in life. By structures I mean our career, relationships, home life, spiritual beliefs, etc. When one of those changes it can make for a tough time. When multiple structures dissolve or change it can pack a serious punch. And that can lead to emotional upheaval. That’s where I’ve found myself. And it hasn’t been all that fun.
I found this from the song list Zen By Design uses in their promotion of their TantraChair. When I listen to it I can’t help but imagine my soulmate will be thinking of me when she hears it.
Ahhh, the single life. There are certainly pros and cons to being single. Eating habits are one of them. I happen to have a slew of cookbooks on my shelves and the tools and hardware to make most anything I want, but I haven’t really been using them. And no, frying eggs over hard doesn’t really count as cooking. Neither does making waffles using the box mixes.
Despite the fact that I know what I should and shouldn’t be including in my diet, my eating habits have definitely slid back to what they were in my early twenties. I still try and eat organic and non-GMO when I can, but I must admit I’ve gotten lazy. Cooking for one sucks the big one. I have absolutely zero desire to eat leftovers for four days or clean a slew of pots of pans after spending the time to make a proper meal that is usually sized for 2-4 people.
I’ve started eating out more, ordering takeout or delivery, or going for quick “meals” that consist of an odd mashup of cereal, triscuits and cheese, nuts, and random fruit that happens to be in the fridge. I used to feel really guilty about not eating better, but I’m starting to get over it, Sometimes it’s just awesome to call an order of spicy boneless chicken wings and a beer “dinner”. Beats cereal (most) any night.
A great tune that’s in more than one of my playlists is “Memory” by SugarCult.
I read a great article over at MindBodyGreen on some of the things people mistakenly do when manifesting their dream partner. I’ve fallen into doing/thinking a few of these myself. Definitely a good read for those of you who are single and looking to find your special someone.
To me nothing captures the raw emotion and sensual excitement of new lovers than Ellie Goulding’s “Love Me Like You Do”.
In the years that have passed since I was twenty, I have been unable to forget about my first girlfriend I had at that time. Yes, I was twenty when I had my first girlfriend. I was a late bloomer compared to many others. It was a short relationship we had – lasting only about 8 months – but it has affected me greatly. There was something about that girl that I couldn’t forget. Even today, twenty years later, I still get butterflies when I think about her and me, and the times we shared back then. I haven’t felt the same way about any other relationship I’ve had like the the one I had with her. Last week I had an opportunity that I thought I’d never have again – to see her again and spend some time with her. It was amazing.
About a year ago I decided to start working out a bit to tone up and lose some unwanted weight. I purchased a Bowflex and started working out 1-2 times per week for about 30 minutes. It wasn’t a big workout routine, but it was something I figured I could stick with.
Combined with weekly sauna sessions in my infrared sauna, the workout seems to have done its job. I’ve toned up quite a bit, dropped about three inches off my waistline, downsized a full shirt size, and have dropped about 15 pounds – putting me back near my college weight. The photo above is a few months old now and I’ve toned up even more, which has prompted me to up my workout to 3-4 times per week to keep heading in the right direction. My goal has never been to become hulky – I just wanted to have a bit more definition and a routine that I wouldn’t stop. I’m happy to say I’ve found something I can stick with.
About a year ago I started using an infrared sauna on a regular basis. I had read about the benefits of infrared saunas and wanted to give one a try to see how it helped me. Infrared saunas are supposed to have many benefits that include helping to detoxify your body and potential weight loss. I had been developing regular headaches – many of which turned into migraines – and experiencing greater sinus allergies, so I was hoping that using a sauna would help me. It did.
I’ve been dating extensively over the past two months with the intention of finding my soulmate. I knew it would be a full time job to find the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I expected to meet a lot of people, make a lot of friends, and create some great memories along the way. But I didn’t expect to find someone that I felt a strong connection to so quickly.
You see, I’ve been a serial dater the past two months. I’ve met several women – often starting off with a meeting over coffee to see if there was any chemistry before deciding whether or not to move forward with future dates. I’ve met a lot of great people, but no one I really felt a connection with. Until recently, that is.
They say that you often find your soulmate when you’re not expecting it. I wasn’t expecting to meet the woman that I just recently did. Yes, she was beautiful. Yes, she was charming. Yes, we had great conversation and what seemed like a good connection. But there were other things I felt after we said our goodbyes that I couldn’t get out of my head. It feels as though I have a deep, unspoken connection with this woman. Like we’ve met before. I feel comfortable with her already, despite the fact that I know relatively little about her. She told me that she feels as though I’m the male version of her. I feel that same type of connection with her.
Quite honestly, it scares me a little bit to think that I might have found my soulmate. Why? First, I thought it would take more work than this to find her. Second, I’m worried that its too soon for a long term relationship. I’m worried that the connection I’m feeling to her might be the result of my feeling alone and desperately wanting to find my match. Third, I’m not positive I’m ready for her yet. I feel as though I’m still going through a process of self-discovery. I feel like I may not quite be ready to ditch the fun side of being single for a long term relationship.
She’s definitely got me hooked, but I’m planning on taking things slowly with her. One thing my divorce has taught me is that I need to be careful in choosing the right woman for me for my next relationship. I’m really excited about her, but a bit guarded at the same time. Still, I can’t deny that I feel something deep inside that I haven’t felt for a very long time. You can never know the timing of things in life, so I guess its best to just go with the flow and enjoy the journey.
Its been nearly three months since I left my wife after having made the decision that it would be better to remain single for the rest of my life than to continue in an unhappy relationship. I knew that jumping back into the single life would have its ups and downs. The last time I was single I was in my twenties and I wasn’t sure how things would be for me now that I’m in my early forties.
Many articles have been written about the pros and cons of being single. I’ve found many of the points they make to be accurate and I’ll cover a few of the things that I’ve found to be true thus far.
Some Things You Miss When You’re Single…
The biggest thing I noticed immediately was the fact that I didn’t have anyone to share the day’s happenings with when I got home from work. You don’t realize how nice it is to have someone to talk to about the stupid, little things that happened during the day until you don’t. At least I have my German Shepard to talk to.
Another thing I noticed right away – and remember from my twenties – is that it is amazing how long you can go without having any meaningful touch with someone. When you don’t have someone to hold hands with or kiss, you can start to really appreciate the fleeting touch of a cashier’s hand when she hands you your change.
Making dinner for one isn’t very appealing and so I’ve found my eating habits drifting back to that of my twenties – if only a bit more healthy than they were back then. I’ve been eating out much more than usual and my at home “meals” are more of a mashup of random things than a proper meal.
Some Of The Great Things About Being Single…
Its not all bad when you’re single. Although I have a few bad days now and then, I’ve been having a fantastic time overall. Here are a few things I’m loving about single life…
I’ve been dating a lot and meeting a lot of people, which is what you need to do if you’re working to find your soulmate. It is work – and a lot of it. You just can’t sit around and wait for Mr/Mrs Right to appear. I’ve enjoyed each woman I’ve met. To date they haven’t been right for me for the long term, but I take the time to find in each of them something that I recognize as being important to find in my soulmate.
Coming as a bit of surprise to me, I’ve found my sex life to be better than it ever has before. During the course of my twelve year monogamous relationship, I often looked back at my twenties as being the heyday of my sexual life. I wasn’t sure exactly what to expect entering the singles scene, but I’ve been thrilled with what I’ve found. The advent of texting, sexting, the interest in books like Fifty Shades, and the breaking down of sexual boundaries in society has created a whole new world that is far better than what I remember in my twenties.
Lastly, I’ve enjoyed the time to find myself again. Its amazing how you sometimes lose track of who you are, what you like, and what you want for yourself when you’re in a long term relationship. Being on my own has given me a chance to reconnect to my true self and find out who I a now. That’s one of the best things I’ve found from being single.
If you’re currently into meditation you probably know that your lower back can get a bit uncomfortable when sitting for long periods of time. I’ve started to get back into meditation after a pause of almost twelve years and I wanted to find something that would make it easier while sitting. By chance, a friend pointed me to Zen By Design – an awesome company that makes a fantastic meditation chair. If you’re serious about long periods of meditation, this is definitely something you’ll want to check out.