I decided to move my posts related to sexual health to my new blog at GetDirti.com so that posts about myself are kept separate. Check out the site when you get a chance. Also, I’d like to say thanks to those of you who reached out to me to let me know how you found the sexy articles useful in improving your relationships. Keep it up!
It was just a year ago that I was sure I was going to die alone without finding my soulmate. The thought of that being even a minute possibility drove me to start a busy schedule of dating, where I was going out on 4-5 new dates each week. I figured that if I was going to find my soulmate, I needed to begin the work of doing so ASAP. Fortunately for me, I managed to meet her just over two months into my dating foray. In the months since I first met her, my life has changed in ways I never thought possible.
I knew she was special as soon as I met her and our initial coffee date lasted nearly three hours. The conversations flowed freely and I could tell she was someone that I was both comfortable with and enamored by. A few days later we went out to dinner on our first “official” date. I could feel a connection with her that was unlike any other I had experienced before. And so, without much fanfare, I told her all the “bad” things about me once our date was over. I could tell I really liker her and I didn’t want to waste my time or hers if I wasn’t right for her. After I finished telling her all my faults she surprised me by telling me that I was basically a male version of her. I was in awe that I had found someone who could accept me for who I was.
Two days ago I proposed to her and she accepted. I can’t fully express how happy I am to have a partner that’s so wonderful and I’m excited to see what adventures we have as we move through life together. I love you babe!
Last November I made the decision to say goodbye to my unhappy marriage and strike it out on my own. It was time to rediscover myself – who I was, what I liked, what I wanted, and who I wanted to be with. Although I’m perfectly capable of being happy with being single, I knew I wanted to find someone who would help make my life more fulfilling. Life is just better when it’s spent with someone you love.
There’s something absolutely amazing about being in a relationship with someone who does the little things that make it so good. A post-it note here that says “I Love You”, a handwritten note there that says “Have a great day”. Little reminders everywhere that you’re in a great relationship – with someone who cares about you and thinks about you. I’m pretty sure I’m one of the most fortunate guys around. 🙂 Love you too babe!
I honestly never thought I’d find someone so wonderful so quickly after my last relationship ended. I had dated quite extensively last winter, but didn’t expect that my latest solo period in life would come to an end after just a few months.
Dearest Amelia: TT here. No, not “Grandpa TT”. Just “TT” now. Remember how you came to call me “TT”? It’s because you couldn’t pronounce “Ethan”. I really loved hearing you call my name. Your and your brothers’ smiles and enthusiast mornings were something I really cherished and looked forward to each weekend. I miss you and I love you dear Amelia. It’s been a really long time since I’ve seen you and your brother and I just wanted to say hello and give you both a virtual hug.
You’re too young to realize it now Amelia, but you changed my life forever in many ways and I wanted to thank you for the wonderful times we spent together.
Traveling alone can be lonely at times, so I took the opportunity to meet some “locals” while here on Aruba. I’m glad I did. I met two wonderful islanders that afforded great conversation over dinner and drinks and I couldn’t be happier. Not only did meeting them make my trip a bit brighter, but it widened my perspective on how people from around the world think. To those of you who are planning on traveling by yourself, I would definitely recommend taking the opportunity to meet some of the locals at your destination. Thank you Sandra and Shanti for taking a change and meeting me while I was traveling. I had a great time and look forward to keeping in touch with you in the future!
The last two days have done a fucking number on me. We all construct structures on which we lean in life. By structures I mean our career, relationships, home life, spiritual beliefs, etc. When one of those changes it can make for a tough time. When multiple structures dissolve or change it can pack a serious punch. And that can lead to emotional upheaval. That’s where I’ve found myself. And it hasn’t been all that fun.
I read a great article over at MindBodyGreen on some of the things people mistakenly do when manifesting their dream partner. I’ve fallen into doing/thinking a few of these myself. Definitely a good read for those of you who are single and looking to find your special someone.
In the years that have passed since I was twenty, I have been unable to forget about my first girlfriend I had at that time. Yes, I was twenty when I had my first girlfriend. I was a late bloomer compared to many others. It was a short relationship we had – lasting only about 8 months – but it has affected me greatly. There was something about that girl that I couldn’t forget. Even today, twenty years later, I still get butterflies when I think about her and me, and the times we shared back then. I haven’t felt the same way about any other relationship I’ve had like the the one I had with her. Last week I had an opportunity that I thought I’d never have again – to see her again and spend some time with her. It was amazing.
I’ve been dating extensively over the past two months with the intention of finding my soulmate. I knew it would be a full time job to find the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I expected to meet a lot of people, make a lot of friends, and create some great memories along the way. But I didn’t expect to find someone that I felt a strong connection to so quickly.
You see, I’ve been a serial dater the past two months. I’ve met several women – often starting off with a meeting over coffee to see if there was any chemistry before deciding whether or not to move forward with future dates. I’ve met a lot of great people, but no one I really felt a connection with. Until recently, that is.
They say that you often find your soulmate when you’re not expecting it. I wasn’t expecting to meet the woman that I just recently did. Yes, she was beautiful. Yes, she was charming. Yes, we had great conversation and what seemed like a good connection. But there were other things I felt after we said our goodbyes that I couldn’t get out of my head. It feels as though I have a deep, unspoken connection with this woman. Like we’ve met before. I feel comfortable with her already, despite the fact that I know relatively little about her. She told me that she feels as though I’m the male version of her. I feel that same type of connection with her.
Quite honestly, it scares me a little bit to think that I might have found my soulmate. Why? First, I thought it would take more work than this to find her. Second, I’m worried that its too soon for a long term relationship. I’m worried that the connection I’m feeling to her might be the result of my feeling alone and desperately wanting to find my match. Third, I’m not positive I’m ready for her yet. I feel as though I’m still going through a process of self-discovery. I feel like I may not quite be ready to ditch the fun side of being single for a long term relationship.
She’s definitely got me hooked, but I’m planning on taking things slowly with her. One thing my divorce has taught me is that I need to be careful in choosing the right woman for me for my next relationship. I’m really excited about her, but a bit guarded at the same time. Still, I can’t deny that I feel something deep inside that I haven’t felt for a very long time. You can never know the timing of things in life, so I guess its best to just go with the flow and enjoy the journey.
Its been nearly three months since I left my wife after having made the decision that it would be better to remain single for the rest of my life than to continue in an unhappy relationship. I knew that jumping back into the single life would have its ups and downs. The last time I was single I was in my twenties and I wasn’t sure how things would be for me now that I’m in my early forties.
Many articles have been written about the pros and cons of being single. I’ve found many of the points they make to be accurate and I’ll cover a few of the things that I’ve found to be true thus far.
Some Things You Miss When You’re Single…
The biggest thing I noticed immediately was the fact that I didn’t have anyone to share the day’s happenings with when I got home from work. You don’t realize how nice it is to have someone to talk to about the stupid, little things that happened during the day until you don’t. At least I have my German Shepard to talk to.
Another thing I noticed right away – and remember from my twenties – is that it is amazing how long you can go without having any meaningful touch with someone. When you don’t have someone to hold hands with or kiss, you can start to really appreciate the fleeting touch of a cashier’s hand when she hands you your change.
Making dinner for one isn’t very appealing and so I’ve found my eating habits drifting back to that of my twenties – if only a bit more healthy than they were back then. I’ve been eating out much more than usual and my at home “meals” are more of a mashup of random things than a proper meal.
Some Of The Great Things About Being Single…
Its not all bad when you’re single. Although I have a few bad days now and then, I’ve been having a fantastic time overall. Here are a few things I’m loving about single life…
I’ve been dating a lot and meeting a lot of people, which is what you need to do if you’re working to find your soulmate. It is work – and a lot of it. You just can’t sit around and wait for Mr/Mrs Right to appear. I’ve enjoyed each woman I’ve met. To date they haven’t been right for me for the long term, but I take the time to find in each of them something that I recognize as being important to find in my soulmate.
Coming as a bit of surprise to me, I’ve found my sex life to be better than it ever has before. During the course of my twelve year monogamous relationship, I often looked back at my twenties as being the heyday of my sexual life. I wasn’t sure exactly what to expect entering the singles scene, but I’ve been thrilled with what I’ve found. The advent of texting, sexting, the interest in books like Fifty Shades, and the breaking down of sexual boundaries in society has created a whole new world that is far better than what I remember in my twenties.
Lastly, I’ve enjoyed the time to find myself again. Its amazing how you sometimes lose track of who you are, what you like, and what you want for yourself when you’re in a long term relationship. Being on my own has given me a chance to reconnect to my true self and find out who I a now. That’s one of the best things I’ve found from being single.
A few months ago I left my wife and started the divorce process. We had been married for five years, but together for almost twelve. I had reached a point where I was no longer willing to wait any longer to affect a major turning point in my life. When spend years trying to bring change to a relationship and it doesn’t happen, it’s time to leave.
It wasn’t a sudden decision that I made. I had spent months thinking about what to do. Ultimately, there were a few tipping points that pushed me over the edge and finalized my decision to walk out of an unhealthy relationship and start forging a new life for myself.
The past few months have been filled with feelings of happiness, success, excitement, joy, and sadness. Its a mixed cocktail that get served when you leave a long term relationship. I’ve always wanted to try and remain on friendly terms with my ex – even though I have absolutely no desire to return to having a relationship with her. I’ve communicated that with her, but she’s been adamant and in no uncertain terms told me that she doesn’t want anything to do with me. That’s sad to me, but whatever.
I think you can tell a lot about a person when things get tough. And what I’ve seen makes me all the more happy I made the decision I did. Now a few months into our separation, I find myself still trying to offer a friendly “hi” as I pass my ex at work – hoping to just try and open communication enough to be on semi-friendly terms again. Remaining silent as I pass by, all she does it stare at me with cold eyes. I could feel bad or depressed about this, but instead it just makes me glad I made the decisions I did.